Can I get real for a minute? We need to discuss something that has negatively affected the Christmas spirit and I, for one, am not going to stand for it. That's right, I'm talking about inflatable lawn ornaments. I don't know if this is common elsewhere, but it's freaking rampant here in Utah. I've recently twittered about a couple of the more horrendous examples I've seen, however, this issue obviously deserves more attention. To paraphrase the gay kid from School of Rock, they're tacky and I hate them.

There are the obvious ones like Santa with a bag of gifts, a snow globe with penguins and snowmen, and ginormous round ornaments. The last one's the best, because can you imagine all the material you'd have for naughty jokes? Inflatable decorations cost upwards of a hundred dollars and I've seen homes with as many seven or eight. Seriously, go donate that money to Doctors Without Borders or something.

And what I don't get is that some people think this are truly the best thing to happen to Christmas decorations. Like this lady: "An inflatable outdoor Christmas decoration can turn a bare yard into a delightful display that people of all ages will love. Even though I sometimes look at the snow globe inflatable decoration with envy, I think that we made the right decision for our family." If this is you, I'm somewhat sorry if I've offended you. But only somewhat, because you're the one with a six-foot-high snowman in your yard that is very easily punctured. Just sayin'.

Let's examine the evidence.